Goodbye, Goldie baby

 Rest in peace, Goldie, I'll always remember your perked cute butt, and how you liked it when i rubbed your upset tummy. Too bad I had to find out nearly 5 months later, but you came to say goodbye to me in my dream in end of Sept 2024, I got it! you were always such a good boi, Million kisses to you and I will always remember you and miss you and love you, my sweetie Goldie boo. 

January 21st, 2025

Today (now yesterday) was an incredibly awful day. 

Don't wanna spend too much time dwelling over it, but I'd like to remind myself of this burn, in the heart, in my mind, in my soul. Despair, disappointment, also, determination to not be soft on anyone. 

Despite all the admirations/guesstimations/anxiety/false hopes... I'm switching gear and moving on. 

What else can I do? I wanna depart from this world painlessly, but I can't, so what else can I do but to move on and refocus? fruitless endeavour, but you do it anyways. 

I curse all of you who derailed me and set me back. 

I curse you. 

Reset Goals for Jan/2025

 After a strong start in the beginning of January, after talking to Ally i had a huge dip on my positivity and productivity. It turns out to be such a waste of money plunging into the VFX industry of which will take us forever to recover. But what's more important now is to 'keep focus' and stay disciplined. Pick up the exercising and weigh loss regimen, at the same time start dropping CV. 

Goal before end of this month, send out CV's to at least 25 places minimum! can do it within 3 days. Weight wise: have it below 71kg by end of Jan, break the plateau. 

Also keep up with the left-hand practise and French/Canto lessons. 

Watch 2 films by end of month. 

Book read til the end of Chapter 3. 

Have PC fixed. 

Gather all necessary information for tax filing.